hella f**kin' balls-to-the-wall awesome vid

sweet sweet music

Apparently 'Crazy' is the new 'Fierce'

Tyra always brings the crazy. Check out her new tips for smiling:

The Flirting-With-a-Man Smile: “Turn your shoulder to your man, move your face down, and use a sound effect, a little hmmmmmmmmm."

The Surprise Smile: "We’re not smiling like the surprise is real — it’s not ‘OMG, are you serious?'" It’s a hand to the cheek, and a gasp. Remember, the surprise isn’t like, swine flu or an unexpected breakup; it’s more of a "I forgot my contacts at home!"

The Catalogue Smile: "Put the left foot forward, and turn your head ahead as if there’s wind whipping you that way, and smile with your hand on your head and parted teeth. So walk forward with your hand on your right cheek, and step with your left foot, so your booty sticks out."

The Angry Smile: Save this one for "bitches." You move a hand to your hip, look forward, "dip that booty to the right," and let your face say "Okay, okay, okay, uh-huh."

The Smile With the Eyes ©: “This is crucial… It’s on magazine covers, it sells perfume, it sells shoes." Tyra recommends pulling your shoulders down, facing forward, pretending there’s a string pulling your head up and that a dentist shot you in the mouth with Novocain. She said it’s “almost like you’re in Star Trek."

My favorite is 'smiling without the eyes' - she look especially bonkers in this shot. And please note the copywrite emblem after "Smile with the eyes' - she gotsta get paid gurl everytime someone uses that phrase.

Courtesy of my #1 contributor EChance

a touch of nostalgia

Pogs!


Back in the day, Pogs were serious stuff, as the wikipedia article confirms:

Because many children would keep the pogs they won in games from other players, many school districts considered Pogs a form of gambling.[4] Pogs proved to be major distractions from classes and the source of various playground arguments. These elements eventually led to the banning of pogs from various schools across North America.[6]

Ah those were the days, when all you had to worry about was someone winning your slammer at recess. I bet superintendents these days are longing for the days of pogs - so badly wishing they could replace the heathenistic extra curriculars of lipstick parties and naked picture texts with the simple pleasures of a pog.


Inspired by DQBIII's gchat status

hahahahahahahahahahahahah

okay, so clearly I am bat shit delusional and super hard up for a post because I've been so busy these past few days, but this shit is cracking my shit up (redundant much?) Anyways, Kelly Ripa annoys the shit (what is this? the South Park episode with the 'shit' counter) out of me so I am loving the exposure of her flaws since everyone seems to think she's so damn perfect.

Click here to see Kelly Ripa's Mutant Belly Button and the always hilarious Dlisted commentary.

But really, that shit is messed up.

5.7.09

Odd Day
Courtesy of EChance

circus animals AKA the best mass produced store bought cookie in the world

So according to Daily Candy this morning, Mother's Cookies are back! Apparently, I'm a fair weather fan, because I was completely unaware that they had be discontinued. So very glad that I never unknowingly took my last bite of a delicious little pink elephant senior year in college. (I know, I know it's been a while and i've been unfaithful - since moving to LA - I've been seduced by that cunning temptress that is Trader Joes bakery cookies) But anyways, yay! So, this weekend,  when that late Sunday afternoon hungover cookie monster get in cohoots with that fat girl inside to decidedly say 'fuck it' let's go to the store, I think Ralph's is the place and Circus Animals are the word.