Your Baby Is An Asshole

if you dig F**k You Penguin, you'll appreciate this...if only for it's domain name alone...

Flash Mob: Hammertime!!

flash mobs have quickly become my new favorite thing. take this week's premiere of weeds....what's the one thing that could distract nancy from the harsh reality that her life now belonged to the mexican mafia: flashmob. for a brief moment, she experienced pure unadulterated joy and bliss. now if only i could be in the right place at the right time. seriously, i could die happy if i witnessed a flash mob. 

iPhone 3G S

this post originally started out titled "iphone 3G S vs. $99 iphone 3G vs. blackberry" where i was going to open the debate on the merits of each device. 

however, after being sucked into the nerd vortex of web geekdom in my attempt to be a responsible consumer by researching the most fiscally conservative choice for my lifestyle, i just said 'f**k it' and reserved one. 

whatever, it's pretty, runs shazam and this application that gives me compliments when i'm feeling low...plus BBMing is for whores and queers. 

according to apple.com i'm eligible for the upgrade price but who knows what those tricky f**ks at at&t will say once i actually get there.  i think after 5 gaztrillion dropped calls, 500 unreceived text messages, and most recently my phone's cute new thing where it shuts off completely whenever i try to open an application (oh and not to mention it no longer receives or places calls) i think i should qualify for the upgrade dammnit.

so, why in God's name am i pouring money into another apple ruse you may ask?  there's a reason they called it the crackberry and not the icrack. just sayin'. plus upon the eve of my 25th birthday, i think it's time i start being honest with myself and admit who I really am and that...is a mac-girl.

either way, june 19th is liberation day and you will at long last be able to call and talk to me at your leisure as i know you have so desperately wanted to for these 9 hellish months of cellular prison. 

*UPDATE* for reasons i can't be bothered to explain, i ended up getting a blackberry. i love it. apparently i don't know myself very well at all. but i guess that's what the second half of your twenties are for. i guess i'm a whore...and a queer. bbm me bitches, i'll send you my pin!

A&E > ABC

As previously mentioned, pigs are flying over a frozen tundra in hell and my attention is no longer retained by 'the bachelorette.' faced by the grim prospect of a monday night sans reality programming (save for charm school... but I prefer to watch my vh1 trash via dvr - i don't know, maybe it makes me feel like im wasting less of my precious time on earth if i've able to fast forward through the commercials) i was overjoyed to discover that A&E has got me covered. 

Intervention: 

embarking on in it's 7th season, i had my doubts that it could possibly continue to deliver riveting and emotional stories of addiction after last week's regular ol' alchi. i mean how, after seven years of crack addicted teenagers and duster huffing ballerinas (especially after the loss of one of our favorite interventionists Jeff VonVonderen who sadly fell off the wagon in the off season) can a show possibly live up to such standards of f**kedupery? i'll tell you how: anorexic twins. last night's tale of the co-dependent twenty-something polish-american anorexic identical twins made good on Intervention's promise of gripping dysfunction...

click to watch sonia & julia's fascinating story

Obsessed:

much like intervention, A&E's new docuseries Obsessed explores the isolating and despairing condition of obsessive compulsive disorder and its bizarre manifestations. the series follows its subjects throughout a 6 week course of therapy, which unlike intervention, allows the viewer a fascinating first hand look at the real pain, anxiety and necessary hard work involved in recovering from such conditions. I already have my favorite therapist, Shana Doronn, who gives Candy Finnigan a run for her money. tune in for next week's affliction: compulsive hoarding, which i'm pretty sure my grandmother has and will likely demystify grey gardens for me forever, but you know i'll be impossible to resist... 

Charlie Resurrection?????!!

p.s. just got finished watching the pilot screener of 'Modern Family' (the new show Ed O'Neill appears in this promo for) pretty funny stuff. absolutely worth a DVR slot. 

Preppy!

three reasons to watch this clip in its entirety

1. freeze frame

2. friends forever

3. johnny dakota reference

check out zack morris on jimmy fallon:

classic. 

now that morris and spano are in, if you haven't already, please remember to sign the petition for the SBTB reunion here.

UPDATE: Saved by the Bell fans are serious, don't f**k with them: Nikke Finke gets her ass chewed  for hating on this segment.